Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Find the Song that will Dance You Awake

Find Your Own Song of Truth

This song began with a desire to know self-healing, self-trust and inner wisdom. In the shadow times when I missed my lover and my life with him, I needed to know that everything happening was leading me to a more powerful place. Back then, there were many people around me struggling through their day to day lives and this song was for them as much as for me. It felt so hard to know what to do next so I questioned the Universe over and over to show me the reason for experiencing unbearable pain and how to rise above it. This song came together in few short weeks and gave me such tremendous hope:

"Where do you wander in your body of dust?
What do you need and who do you trust?
How do you heal and do you see the real?
Come sing a song of freedom,
I know just how you feel.

Come share your sadness.
Release any hate.
Look for the oneness beyond all the ache.
Touch only beauty, your soul wants to dance.
Come sing a song of freedom.
Just give yourself a chance.

Free from slavery arise
It’s time to open up your eyes
And lift away that look of pain
To open up your great heart again

Look deep inside you and feel your desire
Is it one that can burn you or lift you up higher?
Does your smile lead to laughter?
Is your intention clear?
Come sing a song of freedom.
There’s only right now and here

Come let your deep imagination soar.
Believe for a moment, you can always ask for more
Let go of limitation, let go of all the fear
The one you have been waiting for
…is finally here.”

Ganga Fondan, 1998, Invocation to Freedom

And in the flickering candlelight of a one room apartment, my heart sang so intensely with the desire to experience Truth. Closing my eyes I sometimes saw a great blazing fire surrounded by many people who slowly started to dance. At first their movements were gentle and careful and gradually became more animated. Everyone longed to know the great Creator within and in the presence of music and sincere intention, the beautiful feelings would come. Sometimes the song felt like a private prayer and whenever someone was deeply sad or disillusioned with life, my heart would sing out to them. Even during the day, this song would dance in my thoughts and keep me smiling. Beyond all the cynicism of the world around me, the peace would come again and again. In that stillness, the Creator lifted my life from the inside. Singing would often erase any feeling of separation. We became One. Truth.

In those precious moments, the words of my Teacher would ring in my memory:

"This is the Truth and knowing this Truth will set us free. Free to be whatever we want to be, do whatever we want to do, and have whatever we want to have. Intellectual understanding is not enough. It must be believed. It must become our knowing. When it becomes our Being then we will realize the Truth and the Truth shall set us free." *

Practicing the Four Proclamations and doing the exercises of my Teacher, I realize more and more what his words mean. The intellect cannot satisfy the yearning of the heart. Otherwise we merely live someone else's definition of Truth. We must experience our Oneness in order to make peace with ourselves. We must experience this Truth within ourselves. Then we can take charge of our life and live the life we truly desire.

Everyone has a way to this knowing. Beyond loneliness, beyond pain and fear, this knowing waits in the silence within. We each find a way to reach that place and and experience it personaly. The final verse of the song takes us there:

"Knock on the door and it shall open unto you.
Ask for a kingdom and this heaven shines through.
Ask for its comfort and feel its embrace
shining all around you in each smiling face.
Rising within... you are never alone.
Come sing a song of freedom and dance your way home.

Free from slavery arise.
It’s time to open up your eyes
and lift away that look of pain
to open up your great heart again
to open up your great heart again."

I celebrate this song of our freedom here and now.



* Quote from "Ancient Secrets of Success for Today's World" - by Tulshi Sen

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Can You Feel the Universe Love You Back?

When the Universe Loves You Back

Back in 1998, at Narayan's request, we went to a beautiful lake to spread his ashes. The boatman drove in spiral circles as we placed fresh roses and dried roses into the water which sparkled brilliantly in the sunlight. It was then I decided to sing "Amazing Grace" with his old guitar. The most beautiful feeling came over us in a soft breeze. The whole of nature seemed to be the embodiment of my lover. This song came out a few years later to commemorate what it felt like to want to hold the entire universe in my arms and love it back:

"Let me bloom in your garden of plenty
Let me soar, let me dance, let me sing
Spread my arms open wide to the laughing sun
As it shines on everything

Let me give when my heart is open
Let me brighten the world with a smile
Let me know there is always another way
Another view, another style

Everyone hears a different drummer
Sometimes it seems like we dance alone
But in this life's great symphony
Every note will lead us home

Let me ask for the things my heart yearns for
Reach out and touch them all in One name
Let me feel all of life in its ecstasy
Let no moment be the same

Let me stand by the words that I have spoken
Let me plant seeds of truth that they may grow
Let me shine when my heart feels its purpose
Let me live free wherever I go

Let me feel with compassion and mercy
Let me stay on this path rich and sweet
Let me close my eys and be still sometimes
to bask at the garden of your feet

Ganga Fondan, 2002

Singing is a way for me to hug the Universe back. This song in particular brings up the feelings of that day of spreading Narayan's ashes. Narayan's mom and sister and his step-father were there with me in that boat. The boatman was a friend of Narayan's. Narayan's mom brought 24 fresh roses and I brought all the dried roses from past celebrations. The boatman started at the center of the lake and began to make slow circles wider and wider. His mother opened the bag with the ashes and motioned for me to take some into my hand. The ashes felt silky and so fine and silvery gray. There were bits of bone and teeth and they felt smooth. I looked up at Narayan's mother She held that bag like it was her baby. Her courage to face this day kept me vigilant and in complete awe. Then we would slip some ashes into the water. Each of us would take turns. Then a fresh rose, then a dried one and on and on... letting go and letting go some more...

Then when everything was safely in the lake, the massive spiral circle held its shape before us. A million sun sparkles danced on the slight movement of the water. Everything was perfect. Narayan was completely present. I heard the leaves rustle in faraway trees. I saw the soft billowy clouds floating in rapture across the sky. The universe seemed to be watching. Reaching for Narayan's guitar, "Amazing Grace" came pouring out through my soul. After a few more songs, we headed back towards the shore. I remember when the boatman gave me a hug afterwards. He said that the lake would never be the same again. Beneath my smile, I believed that the whole world would never be the same again.

It's only in this last half year that I'm beginning to allow these memories to flood my mind. Keeping those days in silence was a way to nourish and nurture the heart which grew with the outpouring of songs. Now, lately, I feel Narayan's whisper. He reminds me that these memories are a great gift to pass on. Every moment is a letting go, even now. By recording the songs, remembering where they come from, honoring the moments that designed them and reveling in the power of love itself, we embody a deeper purpose for our love. Long ago, we had the words "you and me forever" engraved on our wedding rings. Suddenly I realize that forever is not linear time, but precious moments that dance eternally like stars that still shine long after their flames have been stilled. They find new ways to celebrate themselves and uplift lifetimes of humanity.

And so like this song today, my life reaches out to celebrate being alive. Celebrate the wonder of love and being loved. Celebrate the Universe personified in a noble and wise heart that shaped itself a beautiful body to love and be loved by me. Once broken free, this love exploded into infinite pieces which still float majestically around my life and intensify everything I touch and everything that touches me.

So many people come into my life and ache to experience love like this but they have built thick walls of cynicism and fear around themselves. These walls keep them from seeing the stars at night or gushing over the light of the moon. These walls keep them from tasting their food or making faces with babies. The magic and wonder of life eludes them. I admit there were many moments when loneliness and sadness crept into my thoughts to build a wall and always my Teacher would guide me with exercises and meditations to prevent this from happening. He would gently advise me to do them and say:

"Then you will be transported to a land of magic, color and vibrancy, and you will realize that the place that you lived all this time is not the same as you had perceived it to be." - "Ancient Secrets of Success for Today's World"

Every time my heart would blossom again, my love for Narayan would seem to open even more. How can we separate the Creator from nature, the lover from the beloved? Everything is One.

"Let me feel with compassion and mercy
Let me stay on this path rich and sweet
Let me close my eys and be still sometimes
to bask at the garden of your feet"

May you experience the rapturous love you desire whether it is the love of God, the love of a soulmate or the love of a friend. They are all the same gift in different forms.

May bliss find you over and over,


Friday, July 24, 2009

Behold the Daughter of the Earth and Sky

Rainbow Daughter of the Earth and Sky

"Oh Beloved Rainbow Daughter
Reveal yourself at last through this heavy veil

Lead us in this time of great transformation
Dance us into reconciliation with our One Mother

Let us feel Her emergence from the lifeblood of the sea
Drawing our every limb and muscle from the bounty of earth

Breathe this dream deeper into us
That we may feel the fire of Her Spirit

That we may restore this spinning space
To the great Dream that guides us back to Her

Through the world of colors
Flight and soaring into white…

Bring this Heaven back to light
Oh Beloved Rainbow daughter

That we may let go the pains of loss and ignorance
And prepare a worthy place for all the generations of Peace"

-Ganga Fondan, 2009

Tonight's posting is a prayer into the unknown, a song of reaching into the great Promise itelf. My Teacher once told us that every desire is a promise fulfilled. When we ache for something and feel it in our heart, then we connect to it's existence because it is real. We don't yet have the equipment to know it in the 3-dimensional world. That is why vigilance of thinking is so important. Protect that dream at all costs.

Losing Narayan, my soul cried out to know why I was meant to love my beloved so much only to let him go. In my utter exhaustion and desperation, a still small voice replied and filled me with a desire to find my answers through writing songs of freedom and peace. The guidance and wisdom of my Teacher gave me the tools for unlocking grief and loneliness which in a greater light revealed themselves as joy and romance with nature. Eventually realizing the impossibility of being seperated, my beloved comes back to me and dances in every windswell, in every song of the birds, in the soft clouds that float across the sky and in the drops of rain that pound the midnight earth. He rests in every gentle tear and rises in the passion and devotion of the music that choreographs my life. The symbolical rainbow child represents the unity of the earth and sky. She rises out of the love of the sun for the water. Only then can rainbows appear.

This unfolding is revealed so beautifully by the words of my Teacher:

"The Kingdom of God is in the Absolute, beyond time and space and the centre of your Being, the region of Unconditioned thought. In unconditioned thought there is no doubt or anxiety, it is a certainty because there is no dependency on any condition to manifest the thought. It is a state of assured expectation." - Tulshi Sen

Narayan lives beyond conditioned thought. He shed his three dimensional body and lives in a place that I cannot see, taste, touch, hear or smell and yet there he is. All wordly knowledge can not give me this understanding. The absolutes to this life cannot be measured by the mind. They are ever changing. When we reach for the dream that calls beyond this world, we see a way beyond the mundane day to day tasks of our life. We see a rainbow forming on the horizon. It calls us back into the heart of our existence; How to raise our children, how to care for the sick, how to call forth intelligent and responsible leadership, how to care for the elderly and how to honor our innermost desires. Everything waits in that "state of assured expectation". Each of us holds a piece of that dream. Each of us holds bliss of an ecstatic Universe. We are all One.

There is no guarantee of how long we will have the luxury of a 3-dimensional body. Narayan reminds me of this again and again. What this moment offers is unique. What would you like to shape and mold out of it? What would you ask of the Rainbow Daughter? What would you offer the Great Mother as a legacy for those who follow this unfolding? Protect that dream at all costs.

Oh Beloved Rainbow Daughter:
Reveal yourself at last through this heavy veil
Fill us with the knowing
That our true heart's desire
is already written in the heart of the rising Sun

Peace Be With You,

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

To Live as a Goddess in This World

Becoming One with the Woman Song

Who was I as a woman and what was I supposed to become if I was not a wife or a mother? Without a burning desire to be a career woman, I felt like there was something wrong with me and this made it very hard to move around freely in my day to day life. I ached for some kind of passion and intensity to rise within me so that I could express something valuable. Out of this longing another song was beginning to take shape. I had no idea then how powerfully these words would guide me toward wholeness and encourage personal growth. It all began during a spring thunderstorm and took its time to formulate over a few weeks. I was missing Narayan terribly and so I sat up in bed, lit a candle and asked for help:

"Lord bless the spirit of woman
Guide her gently through the night
For she's had much to bear
But if she knows you are there
She'll always turn her face towards the light"

Essentially my heart believed in the goodness of all women and knew that many would not even have the strength to ask for themselves so I suddenly wanted to ask on behalf of all of them. That gave the song a powerful momentum and meaning right from the start. Narayan's faithful guitar felt soothing in my hands.

"Lord bless her tender aching heart
As she seeks her true family
Kindle her wondrous love
Help her to rise above
and feel her true divinity."

When it is hard to recognize our uniqueness and nurture it, there is a desire to fit in somewhere and feel understood by at least one other. The song was beginning to take on a flow of its own and the verses came quickly:

"Help her let go of all the times that betrayed her
Show her the sweetness of the girl
Help her to find all the beauty deep inside
To live as a Goddess in this world"

At that time I was spending copious amounts of time with my little niece who was just two. She was the essence of innocence and vulnerability and yet when I stared deeply into her eyes, she seemed like a discerning ancient grandmother. Her strength was soft and enduring. These qualities became my aim.

"Lord it's been hard for woman
Help her now to set the mark
That she may feel your Grace
and with a smile on her face
feel all the freedom in her heart

Help her let go of all the times that betrayed her
Show her the sweetness of the girl
Help her to find all the beauty deep inside
To live as a Goddess in this world"

Over the years, this song journey strengthens me from inside. Now I begin to see my unfolding manifested in womanhood beyond my own. The feminine energy rises to stand beside the masculine in balance. Feelings and flexible thinking together are qualities of invincibility. The words of my Teacher resonate with this realization.

"As the Universe so the Individual, as the Individual so the Universe."

Through meditation and songwriting this odyssey connects me further and further with the awe and wonder of life.

I am the embodiment of Consciousness.
I am the embodiment of Consciousness.

So are you.


PS Oh and by the way, if you are in the Vancouver, Canada area this week-end, you won't want to miss this amazing two day seminar happening on July 25th and 26th. Many of these Master Key tools have opened a whole new level of creativity and awareness for me. This is all cutting edge stuff that really works.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A Wisdom Song from Long Ago Today

A 14th Century Song of a Peacemaker

Do you remember the 70's television series called "Kung Fu"? David Carradine played a young Shaolin priest named Caine who travelled across the States teaching all kinds of people a way of peace and unity? Well when I was ten years old this show mesmerized me completely. Every Wednesday night my mom and I would be glued with abandon to the television set. There is one episode that I remember to this day: One of the Masters was standing with the young Monk, Caine, by a goldfish pond and telling him that there are as many worlds as there are fish in that pond and then add the two worlds of they themselves standing there watching those fish. It was a puzzling statement to hear at the time. I did not realize then that I would spend many years contemplating that very idea in my adulthood.

Accepting the idea that Narayan was preparing to leave this world seemed impossible to me until shortly before the moment arrived. I identified his life with his body, with his physical and emotional presence in my life. Where would he go? The distance seemed unbearable to bear. Riding through the ebb and flow of my loss afterwards, a song by an ancient and powerful poet would soothe my aching heart. Past logic, past attachment and ignorance, the words carried me into another existence of Oneness. Eventually with a few guitar chords, it became a personal experience that I would repeat over and over. Listen to the words:

“The river and the waves are one surf:
Where is the difference between the rivers and the waves?
When the wave rises, it is water;
And when it falls, it is the same water again.

Tell me Sir, what is the distinction?
Because it has been named as wave,
shall it no longer be considered as water?

Within the Supreme Brahma
the worlds are being told like beads:
Look upon that rosary with the eyes of wisdom.” – Kabir
(translated by Rabindranath Tagore)

In our eager attempt to understand this world, we define and cut it up into little fragments of knowledge over and over until we actually believe them all to be separate. In the process we lose our sense of wholeness. Everything becomes my god, your god. My country. Your country. My money. Your money. My life. My death. Your birth. Your death. No wonder the fear of leaving this world has us so paralysed. When we can set the intention to go beyond this fear we take a great step towards reconnecting with the heart of life. We discover our true relationship with the Universe.

Kabir invites us to embrace the wholeness again. Water is still water as it flows in the kitchen sink. When it pours down from the clouds, we call it rain. As it freezes in a vast ocean, we call it an iceberg. As it flows through our body, we call it blood. As it pours forth from our eyes, we feel our tears. Are these not all still water? Kabir examines this question through the metaphor of water. As long as these definitions of the same substance continue to seperate our thinking, we will lose the great presence of water itself.

So often in that excruciating pain of separation, my urge to pick up Narayan's guitar came again and again. Kabir would invite me to let go and feel my unity with everything again. Water rushed through my imagination with waves rising and falling until everything was water. Everything hard and painful became fluid and revitalizing. Even my emotions softened and became watery tears running down my cheeks. Always in these moments I remember the words of my Teacher : "You are the drop of the Ocean and all the Ocean is in the drop of the Ocean."

I Am the drop of the Ocean and all the Ocean is in the drop of the Ocean.

A great poet who lived 700 years ago still offers so much joy. He still reaches out in profound words to show us all the way home.


Monday, July 20, 2009

The Song that Helped me Conquer Mountains

How are the Valleys Higher than the Mountaintops?

Years ago when my finances had catapulted into the "valley of the shadow of death" and my life seemed so disconnected from everything, my Teacher was explaining about conquering mountaintops and knowingly entering the mysterious valley. What I came to realize on that day was that if I was aiming for a mountain higher than the one I was standing on, then the valley I would go through would be greater than the distance I just scaled to get where I am standing now. It was like a lightbulb that went off over my head. On that day I didn't worry about the pain of the impending decline, only that I would some day feel a sense of purpose and momentum again. Now many years later, I feel like another mountain has been conquered and I have my heart set on a higher peak again. Like my Teacher assured us all those years ago, a great boon will be granted as we approach our desired destination. That is how I feel about the many songs that have come to help me reach my mountain top.

One of my greatest sources of strength was found writing the song "Higher Still". Whenever things feel really hard and horrible, I play this song on Narayan's old guitar and remember that control is really an illusion. It is a shadow that we rely upon to give us a sense of security. When we can rely on something that we cannot see or feel or taste or touch or smell...something that is beyond our intellect...then we begin to recognize our true source of strength cannot be measured or quantified. Where does that leave the tools of science? What is this Infinite in whose image we are made? Many cultures and traditions use the word God, or the Creator, Lord or Mother Nature or Consciousness. We each have a personal connection with that source of power and name it accordingly. In a world where everythig around us is changing so fast, we are bombarded with information-overload. Yet can this flashflood of images and words tell us who we are or where we are going from here? At times we need to be ok with not knowing the answers and trust that we are guided from within. These words always heighten my courage to look deeper into the heart of life:

"I stand on a mountain
And see a higher one still
I must go through a valley
To conquer that hill
You’re the guide of my journey
I live in your Name
You move me forward
Till nothing’s the same
You lift my eyes upward
To that next highest peak
While the battle is raging
In that valley so deep

O Lord how you lift me
Every time I let go
I feel you inside me
As I tremble so

The dark has subsided
The sun shines anew
That mountain is waiting
I know what I must do… "

Ganga Fondan, 2005

Stepping into the unknown valley can be overwhelming. Even terrifying. But until we take that chance towards inner experience we cannot phathom that the very power that took care of us in our mother's womb is still with us. We won't be able to grasp the sense of awe and wonder that a child has seeing a butterfly for the first time. We need to reconnect with our inner knowing again. That is why I chose this song to be on my upcoming album. It has served me so well and may do wonders for you too. Here's to your own journey of conqering mountains.


PS "Remember to let your valleys be higher than your mountaintops." - Tulshi Sen

Friday, July 17, 2009

Have You Got Your Postcard from the Sun?

Postcard from the Sun

"Through the many faces of my life
I've been a daughter, a sister, a wife
Each full of love and great lessons taken in
Now it's time for a new chapter to begin

I want to find my own dream again
I want to break through these clouds of rain
straight to that bright shining sun
in the name of the One
I have my claim
I'm going to find my own dream again

I won't listen to what my country wants
I won't listen to what my family wants for me
'cause this heart is flying free
Straight to that bright shining sun
in the name of the One
I have my claim
where I live my own dream again

Oh i feel grateful for all I've learned
and for the people to whom I turned
Now like a river that flows to the sea
I let them all go now to their own destiny
while I follow that one light
blazing in me
I've got to find my own dream again

I want to find my own dream again
I know I'll break through these clouds of rain
straight to that bright shining sun
in the name of the One
I have my claim
I'm going to find my own dream again

I won't listen to what my country wants
I won't listen to what my family wants for me
'cause this heart is flying free
straight to that bright shining sun
in the name of the One I have my claim
where I live my own dream again

("Postcard from the Sun"- Lyrics, Ganga Fondan, 2009)

This song has been evolving these past 5 years as well. There were so many times when I thought that I would never figure out where I belonged. I had no idea what my dream was and if I even deserved to find it. But singing this song over and over filled my heart with courage again. It helped me to shed all the layers of trying to please everyone around me all the time. I wanted to feel the beat of my own heart. I wanted to internalize the freedom of the 4 Proclamations and stake my claim in the dream of my own making.

Now the time is coming. I feel a great transition is happening in my life. It is a great feeling of honoring the most sacred dream of all...the life I came here to live. The purpose I came here to fulfill. I begin to understand these things cannot be rushed. When the blossom begins to open, we know the reflection of the Vision has appeared. All of our dreams are real and waiting. We need to sing them alive and experience our unity. Only then are we lion-hearted and transformers of this world.

"Your vision is already in your heart, your Consciousness, the absolute where there is no time and space. This is the first creation. And it will unfailingly reflect in the mirror of existence, which is in the manifested world of the senses, the inevitable second creation. When you know this you will not in any way shape or form be concerned about the process of the second creation. This is the secret power of detachment." - Tulshi Sen

It is in these profound words of my Teacher that my song takes flight. Of course, years ago, the depth of what they meant completely eluded me. I only knew that I wanted to feel fulfilled and happy like I did with my Narayan. I knew that I wanted new experiences and sensations that would make the rest of my life rich and romantic. Singing these words over and over have carried me to a place of complete gratitude and have immersed me in a deeper wisdom of the Four Proclamations.

"Postcard from the Sun" embodies the idea that we see ourselves in the ideal already even though the clouds of circumstance don't reveal an inkling of manifestation to our 5 senses. How can we send a postcard if we haven't already arrived? Ahhhh don't ask the mind for the answer, appeal to the heart to show you the way.

Isn't it time you received a postcard from the dream of your own longing?
(Mark it: "Return to Sender") Tee Hee.

I greet the God in you and your journey!


Tuesday, July 14, 2009

There Are Moments You Remember All Your Life...

There Are Moments You Remember All Your Life...

Press Record.
Heartbeats held by a thumb brushing against the strings...
The river of moments washes over me
They come alive again in words and feelings
They rise into victories
Their lessons ache to be celebrated
The feel of the soul dancing
The letting go and finding everything
The solidity of connection with Nothing
Soaring freely in an endless sky
Giving birth to inner Creation
The moments of my life come to expression

They offer themselves as bridges into songs
which lead back to wholeness again.
Ganga Fondan, 2009

While starting to record at Prosad's Beaches Studio yesteday, I felt such overwhelming feelings of gratitude and connection. Like my life has been preparing for this stage for the last eleven years. No matter what happens, the sheer ecstatic realizaiton of that is worth celebrating!

So many thoughts and feelings raced through me. Narayan was definitely there watching over me. He was the greatest catalyst who drew me out of my shell to come forward and create with him. Through the years of treatment, we sang to vision our next vacation. When we were frightened of losing each other, we sang about the power of love. When we felt blessed to be alive, we sang about gratitude. Every song seemed to be a bridge to where we wanted to be.

Now, after eleven years, I have learned many tools to draw from within and embrace strength and insight. With Narayan's old guitar in hand, many mountains were conquered and new horizons of my soul explored. He remains with me in spirit and our love reaches outward in wholeness. So many feelings rushed through me in that studio yesterday. I want to remember them all. They honor this journey. We continuously draw from the largest aspect of ourselves and expand in Oneness. The exciting thing is: there's so much more to discover.

May you also experience that tremendous joy that arises when you are completely in your element, in your zone, in your creative electricity. May your voice sing your highest story so that all our connections will become more and more real and alive. Then we can pass on this promise and knowing to our children and their children. That to me makes life worth living. Narayan left this world at the age of 33 and only now I realize that through my actions and aspirations, he continues to impact here and now. How precious that is to me.

PS Did you notice the "Bee Awareness" insignia in the picture? These exercises are truly amazing.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Who will Lead Us Back to Awe and Wonder?

Lead Us Back to Awe and Wonder

"My teacher is so near to me that I scarcely think of myself apart from her. "How much of my delight in all beautiful things is innate, and how much is due to her influence, I can never tell. I feel that her being is inseperable from my own, and that the footsteps of my life are in hers. All the best of me belongs to her - there is not a talent, or inspiration or a joy in me that has not been awakened by her loving touch."
- Helen Keller, "The Story of My Life"

Watching the movie, "Miracle Worker" always moves me to tears again and again. Anne Bancroft and Patty Duke portray this true life story of a young deaf and blind girl who has never experienced her world beyond the sense of touch. The relentless endurance and dedication of one young teacher is unlike any other I have ever read or heard about. The young Helen fights tooth and nail against the discipline and persistent repetitions that are required of her and runs away to the security of the outside world. This is usually the soft affection of her mother who pities and spoils her and wants to make it easy for her daughter. Annie Sullivan strives to make Helen completely dependent on her so that she can open up the realtionship between the inner world and the outer world to her pupil. She never allows herself to see anthing less than Helen's success. At one point in the movie, Annie thinks to herself and ponders the idea that if a young girl were buried alive, the whole town would do everythig they could to dig her out. She questions why no one can see Helen in the same way. Her own commitment to Helen is unflinching. Finally,after many more battles Helen suddenly begins to understand the value of being able to communicate her thoughts and learn about the life around her. Now, the young girl's joy knows no bounds. The ecstasy of her feelings find expression and Helen spends the rest of her life in awe and wonder of everything.

This is evident in the many books Helen later wrote. One of my favorites is "The story of My Life". Her profound journey lifts me and at the same time I feel questions arise:

Where are the teachers that will bring us back to awe and wonder? Where is it in me that I may embrace the success of another with such devotion as Annie Sullivan? With what courage and tenacity will the Song of my Heart bring forth its shining light? How many are yearning to be awakened to the beauty and wonder of living an authentic and rich purposeful life? How many will fight tooth and nail against this waking even though they want it with all their heart?

Profound words of encouragement are found in a poem written by a great Indian poet who articulates this exact sentiment in the following lines:

"So the storm still seeks its end in peace.
As it strikes peace with all its might.
Even thus my rebellion strikes against they love
And still its cry is "I want Thee" - Rabindranath Tagore, "I Want Thee"

As I place the dvd of Helen Keller's life back onto the shelf, I say a silent thank-you for Annie Sullivan who reminds us that "Love Never Fails".

May Love always guide your life and Vision.


Sunday, July 5, 2009

"My Individuality Is A Centre of Expression"


Waking up this morning felt uneasy. It seemed like everything was going to take a lot of effort. Reaching for my copy of "Ancient Secrets of Success for Today's World", the bookmarked page opened itself. On the bookmark itself was written "To overcome fear right now right here, I only need let go." These were the beginnings of a song that started to unfold back in 2003. Feelings of frustration and unclarity had revealed a desire to know what I was really doing with my life:

What is this game?
Help me to let it go.
The safe, the sure,
the solving, the control.
Where is my soul?
Why does it not speak?
How long must I seek
to find the truth?

Slowly I feel
There is nothing between us.
No skin,
No color,
No wall,
No shadow…
When will I know
and see the illusion;
The world’s confusion
toying with me.

Oh I want to be set free
I ask This Consciousness in me
Guide my mind to know
From where I come
There I go…

Help me to see
The oneness of everything-
all sights and sounds from One Source.
But where lies the force
that designs separation
from its own concentration
of Eternity?

Oh I want to Be set Free
I ask This Consciousness in me
Guide my mind to know
From where I come
There I go…

Yes, then will I know,
to overcome fear,
Right now, right here,
I only need let go.

Ganga Fondan, 2009

This song has been a journey in itself for seven years and the lyrics kept changing because more and more clarity came with meditating on the "Four Proclamations". Now today, another realization dawned after writing down some ideas in my notebook.

In his book, "Ancient Secrets of Success for Today's World", the author writes:

"You will know that you live and move and have your Being in the Universe and you will also know that you are your own Universe. You will know that your individuality is a center of expression of All Power. It is through you the Universe continues its creation by becoming you."

In my notebook, I changed Mr. Sen's last sentence to:
"It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.
It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.
It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.
It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.
It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me."

Entering that into my notebook several times gave me such a rush. Suddenly the St. Francis Prayer ("Make me a channel of Your Peace") made more sense. Suddenly it was effortless to think "Of myself I do nothing. It is the Father in me that doeth all the works." Those words had been a part of my upbringing, but it was as if for the first time I could feel the ease of their meaning....the hope of these words and the promise of them. Not comparing myself with Eternity,I (for a glimpse of a moment) was this Eternity. It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me. For those few glorious seconds, happiness flooded my day. This blogpost is the outpouring of this feeling.

In that Oneness, the urge, the expression, the song, the writer, the reader, the computer, the guitar, the notebook, the Teaching, the Teacher and the student are One song or "Universe" in perfect harmony. In that feeling of Oneness there is no resistance to anything. There is only a surrender because I cannot lack. I cannot suffer. I Am Perfect. It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me. It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me. It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me. It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.

The very power that I am writing these words with is that Power. The very power that guides my next breath is that Power. My Individuality is a centre of expression of that Power.

It is through me the Universe continues its creation by becoming me.

"Yes, then will I know, to overcome fear,
Right now, right here, I only need let go. "

Thus is a day filled with Gratitude and Perpetual Joy.