"We Cannot Vision More Than We Are" - Tulshi Sen

"How would I know to seek a greater way of living
If I had not been misunderstood and cast out
If I didn’t have to let go of everything that mattered
To find my life and lose it all over again
If the land around me had not dried up and denied me
And emptied out my accounts
How would I know the hunger that comes
If my dream had not eluded me and faded into the shadows
Leaving me void of meaning and purpose
How would I know the thirst to know myself
If I had not fallen hard onto my knees
Too exhausted to take another step
Too ashamed to ask for help
How would I know that ache or want
Which is in itself an answer hurling itself upon the heart
Invoking there a new blossoming of sound and feeling
Erecting a new earth that shapes itself in and around my Being
How would I know this gift of Grace without the pain of desire
How otherwise would these songs of joy and courage have come"

Ganga Fondan, 2009

This posting is once again inspired by my Mentor’s message. This week’s seminar with Tulshi Sen was a great reminder to look at the correlation of what I desire and how I love. Where do my desires come from: my head or my heart? He explained: “Every Vision is a product of love”. He went on to challenge us on the different aspects of love such as self-serving, co-operative or unselfish unconditional love. The way we love is our pattern of thinking and through this lens we feel what we want in life. In my own experience, this lens comes more into focus as I practice the meditations given in: “Ancient Secrets of Success for Today’s World.” I realize that what seemed so hard and impossible many times in my life were actually gateways to a deeper self-awareness and trust. Only emptied will I discover the wealth of my true heart’s desire.

This week I take a good long hard look at my life and like countless times before, re-evaluate what is important to me and what do I cling on to falsely believing it to be essential to my well being. How much the events in my life have sculpted who I am now and allowed me to build new dreams. Each time there seemed to be a coming together of details that seemed to move me forward. Sometimes a breaking apart also teaches me about myself. This wonderful journey of self-discovery goes deeper still and that feels exciting and frightening at the same time. Still I wonder why I hang on to so many old belief systems. These impede the raising of my belief level and yet I still cling on to them. I love the example of a monkey leaping from limb to limb of the trees completely trusting that he will catch the next branch. He has to let go of the first branch in order to complete the jump. I'm working on seeing myself leaping like that. Maybe a song about it will come or artwork and a poem. Mr Sen teaches that we must build ourselves from within in order to embrace the larger Visions. Meditating on the Four Proclamations has taken me to places I never thought I would go before. Recently I showed a new friend a picture of myself 14 years ago and she did not recognize me at all. She said I have a completely different face and body. I smiled at her and said that I am not that person in the picture. Monumental changes have occured in me.

A beautiful quote came up in the teleseminar this week:

"The coninuous flow of only one kind of thought to the exclusion of all other thoughts is supreme Bliss and is regularly practiced by the wise." - Pitanjali

It seems so simple an idea. When we do what we love to do it seems to make the hours fly by, put colors in our cheeks and put a smile on our face. There is so much more in all of us to find. According to the Ancient teachings, "the only action we ever do is visioning".

This seminar is so rich that I have to listen to it a few times to really let it soak in. You can too - here.

I'll leave you with this quote from the evening. The words have been hanging on a slip of paper over my desk and for some time but now I see them in a new light:

"You are what your deep driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will, so your deed.
As your deed, so is your destiny." - Upanishad Brihadaranyaka IV.4.5