Journal Entry May 31, 2012
Subtle trepidation begins this piece. Initially, a simple water glass. (You can see it if you look upside down and notice the stem.) My Teacher had taught us a beautiful meditation that simply involved dropping an ice cube into a glass and watching it melt. After a rather intense day, I want that dissolving feeling in this art piece but first the journey opens up my imagination to make room for yet another lesson to appear on canvas. Within the ice cube appears an image of me playing guitar and singing. Thoughts streamed through my mind as the images of ice cube, water, girl, glass, water droplets all started to liquefy and the image isn't at all heading in the direction I want. I feel a strong resistance to continue.
Questions come to mind. Often in an art journey, the life journey unravels itself. I think of how much I want to hold on to who I think I am. More colors swirl in water droplets. I think about how much I still live in some of my most vivid memories. What if I lose them? Do they define me? More questions. Then glass is lost. Girl disappears. Only liquid colors swirl on the canvas. Tears inside ache to connect with the eyes. Cries inside long to connect with voice. The inclination to let this one go grows stronger. Surrender is a hard lesson. The melting is part of the honesty.
In that same moment new patterns emerge. An undiscovered land appears. Color and silence both fill me and my breathing slows down. A piece of the past disappears and my heart feels lighter. A feeling of anticipation for something I do not yet clearly see. Now that the ice cube has melted, the One who thirsts picks up the glass and drinks. Tonight I feel consumed and grateful and strangely...right on track.
"Just cultivate your desires and know that your desires activate the infinite energy which you are." - Tulshi Sen
"Just cultivate your desires and know that your desires activate the infinite energy which you are." - Tulshi Sen
